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KRABBY PATTY INSPIRED BY SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

Picture for Krabby Patty inspired by SpongeBob SquarePants

24,015,270 views  The Krabby Patty is a thing of pop culture culinary legend - a burger, forged from a secret formula, worshipped by a sociopathically upbeat sponge. How do we go about recreating that which is not reacreate-able? A bit of science, a bit of whimsy, and a whole lot of wanton conjecture. Fill in the blanks with me this week as we build an umami burger using ingredients from mother ocean!

US

original

metric

INGREDIENTS

DIRECTIONS

INGREDIENTS

chuck steak

1 pound chuck steak

bone in short ribs

1 pound bone in short ribs

Salt & pepper to taste

Salt & pepper to taste

MSG

2 tsp MSG

vegetable oil

2 tbsp vegetable oil

shredded iceberg lettuce

2 ounces shredded iceberg lettuce

yellow American cheese

1 slice yellow American cheese

small vidalia onion, sliced thinly

1 small vidalia onion, sliced thinly

beefsteak tomato, sliced thinly

1 beefsteak tomato, sliced thinly

Ketchup to taste

Ketchup to taste

Mustard to taste

Mustard to taste

large dill pickle, sliced thinly

1 large dill pickle, sliced thinly

sesame seed hamburger buns

4 sesame seed hamburger buns

dried shiitake mushrooms

3 dried shiitake mushrooms

bonito flakes

1 tbsp bonito flakes

dried kombu

½ ounce dried kombu

dried anchovy

1 dried anchovy

pureed sun dried tomatoes

½ cup pureed sun dried tomatoes

yellow miso

1 tbsp yellow miso

shredded parmesan

½ cup shredded parmesan

DIRECTIONS

1.

Trim and cut beef into 1-inch pieces, and spread evenly on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Place in the freezer for 15 minutes, along with the blade of a food processor, until beef is firm. Pulse in the food processor until beef is ground and pebbly. Shape into 4 patties, and season with salt, pepper, and MSG.

chuck steak

1 pound chuck steak

bone in short ribs

1 pound bone in short ribs

Salt & pepper to taste

Salt & pepper to taste

MSG

2 tsp MSG

2.

Heat vegetable oil in a large cast iron skillet over medium-high heat until barely smoking.  Add patties and reduce heat to medium - cook to desired doneness.

vegetable oil

2 tbsp vegetable oil

3.

On the burger buns, assemble the burgers in this order: patty, lettuce, cheese, onion, tomato, ketchup, mustard, pickles, top bun.

sesame seed hamburger buns

4 sesame seed hamburger buns

yellow American cheese

1 slice yellow American cheese

small vidalia onion, sliced thinly

1 small vidalia onion, sliced thinly

beefsteak tomato, sliced thinly

1 beefsteak tomato, sliced thinly

shredded iceberg lettuce

2 ounces shredded iceberg lettuce

Ketchup to taste

Ketchup to taste

Mustard to taste

Mustard to taste

4.

for the MSG-free version

1.

Oven-dry tomatoes at 200°F for about 90 minutes on a nonstick baking sheet. In a spice grinder, grind mushrooms, bonito, kombu, and anchovy to a fine powder and set aside. Combine sun-dried tomato with equal parts ketchup, and miso with mustard. Arrange parmesan in 4 flat piles on a nonstick surface (like a Silpat), and bake at 350°F for about 15 minutes, or until lightly browned and crisp.  Slow-cook sliced onions with a bit of olive oil for 30 minutes or until thoroughly caramelized.

yellow miso

1 tbsp yellow miso

dried kombu

½ ounce dried kombu

bonito flakes

1 tbsp bonito flakes

dried shiitake mushrooms

3 dried shiitake mushrooms

dried anchovy

1 dried anchovy

pureed sun dried tomatoes

½ cup pureed sun dried tomatoes

shredded parmesan

½ cup shredded parmesan

Mustard to taste

¼ cup Mustard to taste

2.

Cook burgers as described above, and once removed from heat, place on a plate and sprinkle with a light dusting of the mushroom powder mix.  Toast the buns in the remaining burger fat.  Let patties rest for 2 minutes before assembling the burgers in the following order: onions, tomato, ketchup, mayo, cheese crisp, lettuce.

small vidalia onion, sliced thinly

1 small vidalia onion, sliced thinly

beefsteak tomato, sliced thinly

1 beefsteak tomato, sliced thinly

Ketchup to taste

Ketchup to taste

yellow American cheese

1 slice yellow American cheese

shredded iceberg lettuce

2 ounces shredded iceberg lettuce

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