3-DAY POTATO SALAD INSPIRED BY SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

For The Standard Potato Salad

Note: I don’t actually recommend pickling the potatoes for this potato salad. You can do so if you’d like, otherwise just skip to the boiling step. Start by pickling the russet potatoes. Peel and cube them and then place into mason jars and top them with sliced cabbage. Put fermentation weights on top of the cabbage to keep everything under the brine.

To make the pickling brine, combine kosher salt and water. Stir until everything is dissolved and then pour on top of potatoes.

Cover the mason jars with some airlock lids, or use a glass bowl and some plastic wrap. Let sit for three straight days.

Drain the pickled potatoes and boil them for 15 minutes or until completely tender. Let cool.

In a mixing bowl, combine minced onion, minced celery, mayonnaise, white wine vinegar, a pinch of sugar, garlic powder, chopped hard boiled egg, and a little bit of kosher salt and ground pepper. Stir to combine.

Combine cooled potatoes with dressing and mix to combine.

Serve and enjoy.

For The Sophisticated Potato Salad

Note: I don’t actually recommend pickling the potatoes for this potato salad. You can do so if you’d like, otherwise just skip to the boiling step. Start by pickling the potatoes. Cut the baby potatoes in half and place them into mason jars and top them with sliced cabbage. Put fermentation weights on top of the cabbage to keep everything under the brine.

To make the pickling brine, combine kosher salt and water. Stir until everything is dissolved and then pour on top of potatoes.

Cover the mason jars with some airlock lids, or use a glass bowl and some plastic wrap. Let sit for three straight days.

After the 3 days, drain and then boil your baby potatoes until they are toothsome (10-15 minutes). Let cool.

As the potatoes cool, combine the following in a bowl: red onion (chopped), sour cream, freshly chopped dill, white wine vinegar, a few pinches of kosher salt, some freshly ground pepper, some thinly sliced scallions, some finely chopped chives, olive oil, and whole grain mustard.

Add the boiled and cooled potatoes to the mixture. Add additional salt and pepper to taste.

For The Patatas Bravas

Note: I don’t actually recommend pickling the potatoes for this potato salad. You can do so if you’d like, otherwise just skip to the boiling step. Start by pickling the potatoes. Cut the baby potatoes in half and place them into mason jars and top them with sliced cabbage. Put fermentation weights on top of the cabbage to keep everything under the brine.

To make the pickling brine, combine kosher salt and water. Stir until everything is dissolved and then pour on top of potatoes.

Cover the mason jars with some airlock lids, or use a glass bowl and some plastic wrap. Let sit for three straight days.

After 3 days, drain the pickled potatoes. Deep fry the potatoes in oil for about 8 minutes. Set aside and drain on paper towels.

Using a mortar and pestle, crush the garlic cloves, making it into a paste. Add the egg yolks and mix them into the garlic paste until they are well-combined. While mixing rapidly, slowly drizzle in some neutral flavored oil until an emulsion forms.

Once your aioli has outgrown the mortar, transport the mixture into a larger bowl. Whisk the mixture while slowly adding olive oil, alternating between different oils depending on preference. Slowly add oil until a thick emulsion forms. Maybe about ½ cup of combined oils for every egg yolk. Season to taste with kosher salt.

Put the deep fried potatoes in a bowl and season them with kosher salt and smoked paprika, to taste.

Pour your potatoes onto a serving plate and top them with the aioli and some sliced scallions.

For The Pickled French Fries

Start by pickling the potatoes. Peel the potatoes and cut them into fry-like sticks. Place them into a mason jar.

To make the pickling brine, combine kosher salt and water. Stir until everything is dissolved and then pour on top of potatoes.

Cover the mason jars with some airlock lids, or use a glass bowl and some plastic wrap. Let sit for three straight days. Then, drain the fries.

Fry the fries in oil. The oil should be peanut or vegetable at 375°F. Fry for about 8 minutes. Lay them on a paper towel-lined baking sheet and place in freeer for 30 minutes.

Remove them from the freezer and fry again for 4-6 minutes. Cook until golden brown. Drain for 30 seconds.

Place in a bowl and season with kosher salt while still warm.